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Jeremy – The Struggles of a Firstborn

By on October 5, 2019

Every home has a firstborn child. And firstborns are special. They grow up with a special destiny and grace. From the moment they are born, they have to take the role of being natural leaders and trailblazers. Firstborns represent the future and the hope of a family. The eldest sons carry the name of the family.

In most societies, firstborns are the heirs of their families. Scripturally, all the children in a family receive an equal share when distributing inheritance but the firstborn receives a double portion. The Bible speaks of this blessing to the firstborn as their birthright blessings.

But he shall acknowledge the firstborn, … by giving him a double portion of all that he has, for he is the beginning of his strength; to him belongs the right of the firstborn. Deuteronomy 21:17

Some people think that growing up as a first born is a blessing. Well, I agree because I’m one, but don’t let anyone cheat you, it is also a curse. Life as a first child is tiring, busy, crazy, overwhelming and frustrating on some days. But it is also fun, amazing, inspiring, exciting, and full of beautiful moments…. That’s why I live. Life can be messy…. but, its messy in a beautiful way.

Life as a firstborn

Life as the eldest child teaches you to be confident. We develop courage to trust our abilities as firstborn children. As a firstborn from the clan of hyenas, I fear nothing except God, my area chief and falling on the mud when I’m about to attend an interview. As a first born, you learn to be embarrassed. You’ll be calm when your ancestors, your clan, and in-laws ridicule you.

Growing up as the eldest child meant a lot of things.

As a first child of my parents, I used to be the spoiled one. I was basically, the apple of everyone and could get what I wanted and needed.

It meant that I was the one who was showered with many new and shiny items especially when I was alone. I was the first to get access to a computer, phone or know family investments before our babies knew them.

Who a firstborn is

I also had and still have a say in what is going on in the family sooner than my siblings. I had more freedom than my kid brothers and sister. I had an upper hand in most situations. As the eldest child, I can say and it becomes. I can command the younger ones to do a thing and they will certainly do it.

As a first child, I can scare my siblings with all the crazy things in this life but this privilege comes with a heavy price. I can dominate conversations and decision making but that’s not everything as a first child.

Being a first child has made me a more compassionate person. I can put myself in someone’s shoes. More often, I stretch to accommodate people beyond what I thought I’m capable of. It also means I can notice small beautiful things every day.

As the man of the house, I constantly witness my siblings and parents being angry, depressed, or emotionally unstable. At such moments, I have to take it upon myself to rescue them. I have to provide comfort and give attention to them.

As the elder child, it means you have to take the bullet for your younger sister, brother and sometimes your parents. When I’m confronted with a situation where I have to choose between my wellbeing and their safety, I will choose the latter. A first child, one has to first consider the younger ones before they mind their hunger and thirst.

As an African child, I know what it means to baby sit my younger brothers and sisters. Mum never hired a nanny – even though we didn’t have a lot. I just had to assume the role and forego to play with others on the streets.

A firstborn

Between paying assisting to pay for the college fees of my siblings and ensuring their safety, I cannot afford a break. In fact, sometimes, I entertained a thought that “I don’t want to have children. They are too much work.”

When earning as a firstborn

Being the firstborn means you have to be greatest hero to your siblings. You alone must know what it means to earn what you will not consume. I have to sacrifice my luxuries in life to support my brothers and sister to study and live a more comfortable life. As the older one at home, I have to give up my going out for vacations because I have to pay the upcoming trip for my brother at school.

Once you start earning, you have the responsibility of meeting all the demands of your siblings whether you have money or not. To them, you are bigger and hence money is no longer a problem to you. Firstborns settle family bills before their own.

You have to be a student besides being a parent, guider, teacher, leader, cheerleader and role model. Sometimes, being a first born means you are the least to get angry. When you are tempted to shout, you have to remember you are a firstborn who is a role model. You have to be the ideal one who does not suffer tempter issues. When things are not working out, you never cry when anyone is seeing you. You cry in your room away from them.

As a first child, you have to never know the meaning of impossibilities in life. You never give you because you are made to work harder and get the best for the sake of your family.

Luckily enough, none of my siblings has let me down. They are all doing well. I have great pleasure not storing my money in a bank but grateful that I met their needs with it. I’m a proud firstborn because all my brothers and sisters seem to have found their angle and they are following behind me. They are growing up bright, diligent, obedient, kind, and gentle. I foresee them becoming greater than I.

I can only ask our Heavenly Father that He makes them greater in wisdom, deeper in love, good in health, and old in age. May they be a display of God’s honor and blessings to me and our parents. May God scatter darkness in their life. The God who is great in love, mercy and faithfulness, will keep till his coming.

Please help my sister land a job/internship

My little sister is looking for a job opening. She holds a Diploma in Tourism Management. She is a bright and gentle soul. She is hardworking and diligent. She would appreciate a role in Tours and Travel industry. Grace has great Customer Care Skills, Tour Guiding Skills and Reservation Skills which she gained as an intern at Department of Tourism at Nairobi City County Government

While she is a young graduate with some experience, believe me she is a hard worker and she will make it up with hard work. Grace just needs an opportunity and she will be a great team. She is a team player, sharp, and mindful of others. You will find a valuable team member of your private or public organization. Our little jewel deserves an opportunity, I believe she is qualified and can get things done.

If you have a suitable role or refer her, please let me know through +254 722 481 993/ +254 724 004 128 or write to us jeremiahwakamu@gmail.com

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